Trust in Nothing

by Mar

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    "Trust in Nothing" tape plus bonus zine: "Murmurs, Chants, and Screams" Vol I by vocalist Kay.

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1.
Ghost: You’re not trash, never were. Choked thoughts on the ground. Heat on skin, your screams come out. We hid our hair and our limbs. We slept with one eye open. Don’t– Don’t speak. Hide your hips. Don’t look back. SISTER, HIDE YOUR FUCKING PAIN.
2.
Their faces shine bright in the dark. I try, but can’t push them out. These lines aren’t cuts, they’re a map. THESE LINES AREN’T CUTS, THEY’RE MY MAP. Now you have arrived, to settle and mend. Each bone arranged. Re-enact the rape.
3.
MEMORY... IT SPLITS. THE MIND IS A PRISM.
4.
02:10
That night was simple. One night is... it’s simple, right? This body is failing, it’s fallen. The mind, unraveled. I can’t feel my legs, can’t feel my face... That night was simple, so simple. ONE NIGHT IS SIMPLE, RIGHT?!
5.
Can’t help, can’t stop. I know I know I know. I CAN’T. I keep holding. The bruises, the screams... the phone on the floor. You shed, but I can’t. I carry them all. YOU SHED IT. I CAN’T. I CARRY IT. I’m in love. Can’t help, can’t stop. I know I know I KNOW! I CAN’T. I keep holding. Beaten over the head. But the heart is still beating.

credits

released August 15, 2016

music by MAR.

samples from MARILYN VAN DERBUR and
the film “IL DESERTO ROSSO”.

recorded & mastered by will killingsworth
at DEAD AIR STUDIOS in Leverett, MA.

artwork & layout by KAY BELARDINELLI.

lyrics by KAY BELARDINELLI.

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Mar Providence, Rhode Island

eiríkr åsheim &
kay belardinelli
. . . . . . . . . . .

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